Needless to say, a couple of years back I attended the Halloween party for my nephew, J.J.'s Cub Scout/ Boy Scout thing. Some kind of "pack party." To be honest, all he sales pitched me on was the fact it was a Halloween party. Anyway, I clearly did not want to be apart of the whole thing and being dragged to would have been one of those therapy moments where going back to a familiar situation would cause a positive flash back. Instead, it turned into a horrible experience and affirmed as an adult how stupid the institution is. Well, I was told to dress up in a Halloween costume. After a long thaought out discussion in my head about the cheapest way to go about a Halloween costume without breaking the bank. I went with my usual, being a Zombie.
The whole night took place in a school gym. The set up was a bunch of stationed games. Mine was to lay down on a blue tarp. Your partner had a stick with a line tied with a marshmallow on the end. Name of the game was to try and get the mallow into the kids mouth who was laying on the tarp. Then both kids switched. It seemed to be a hit for the whole night. Some kids particularly loved my Zombie costume. Some of them were a little freaked out. However, let's be fair. As compared to my normal look. I though I downplayed my costume. I even had two moms in the neighborhood comment on what I should do to be kid friendly. So nothing was exaggerated or so over done in gore I would have caused nightmares. This was not my goal. My whole existance for the convention was to be there for my nephew.
Well, as usual, someone had to say something. A rather tall lady, maybe in her 30's walked up to me. Her costume in particular was an Angel. We're talking white gown, white wings, a halo and then to complete this... A pair of devil horns and a pitch fork.
She walks up to me and says, "Don't you think a Zombie is a little too scary for these kids."
In return I said, "Right and a Naughty Angel isn't dressing like a slut by any means." That's right I implied if you dress up as a Naughty Angel you might as well have dressed up as a slut. I mean, what will a Naughty Angel NOT do??
Needless to say I went from adult time with adults and children to high school in bitch-10 seconds. I felt it was worth it. I mean worth it enough the Naughty Angel caught my drift and never spoke to me the rest of the evening. Furthermore I was also asked by the Pack Leader to never come again. Let's recap, dressing like a Zombie, being told I maybe too scary for the kids and in return calling the Naughty Angel a slut kicked me out of more potential Boy Scout meetings. Yeah, if this isn't fucking Déjà Vu, I don't know what is.
Back when I was a kid I got kicked out because I may have told the kids at camp the bible maybe scientifically incorrect because it states in Genisis there's two great lights the sun and the moon. Obviously the moon is just reflecting sunlight. This and a food fight/ really fist fight with Vincent Mayes over the same subject caused me to never go to Boy Scouts.
Needless to say, I didn't get the memo when I was a kid maybe Boy Scouts are for people who need structure. Even as an adult I can still be told to never come back. Go figure.
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