With my deepest apologies to "people" whom read the trials and tribulations of Savage & Smooth. Also known as My Life. Let's do a two month recap of what's been going on the past two months. Which by the way isn't easy to go through, or try to chronologically jot down. I would also like to apologize for any inconsistencies for this read. Again, a lot has gone down... So, where to start.... (I do a quick gloss of my last post to figure out where I left off)
Last weekend I hosted my very own Out of the Darkness walk and raised $150 online and $98 at work. Which brings the grand total for $248! Which is by the way, above and beyond what I thought we could raise in the first place.
Saturday was a nasty day. Over cast was the name of the game. Lor looked at the forecast and told me it was supposed to let up before 11:00 and so in my head I said ONE thing to God... "God, you have a forecast schedule to stick too. Don't fuck me over." I'm sure that's not the best thing to say to God. But to be honest, it was like he had one day to NOT rain on my parade.
I showed up to the park and everyone I expected to be there was there. And I had a few surprises too which was nice. I had a photograph of my father for the walk and we all shared for a moment why we are all there. Everyone walked a 'nature walk' which had a beautiful scenery of the ocean and forest. Too soon 2 o'clock came and everyone went home before I could do my walk. However, a good friend walked with me and we talked about life. Then I went home.
This is an old story which I can't seem to get over. So, I'm going to go over it. I feel like this is something that could have been covered in a different post. However, this is a recap of 'Trials and Tribulations.' Nearly a month ago I got a phone call from our new property management.... Wait, let me go into this too....
So, when we moved into our beautiful condo in February it was nearly the worst situation to wind up in. Let's start with the fact the property management was a piece of shit. They knew two weeks in advance Lor and I were driving from Virginia to get into our condo. Then a week prior I called and said, 'We wont be able to make it on Friday. We'll see you on Monday." We spent the weekend in Woodburn and relaxed from traveling across America. We show up and the property management, "Churchill and Associates" was acting like they had no clue what we were talking about when we showed up. They gave us the garage to put our stuff into but kept the house keys till the utility guy 'fixed' whatever was wrong with the house. Fiar enough, but we had them pay for our hotel stay because Erica didn't put a sticky note on the property or even communicate with anyone we had intentions of moving in on Monday. What a hassle. Topping it all off I had mailed out a Safety Deposit two months prior and they had never "received" the check via mail. So they let us pay the rent and their job was to find the missing check. Two months later and I get a phone call on the 15th of March from them saying, "We haven't received your March Rent." Let's brake this down... On the MEMO section of the Check I've put what each check is supposed to be paying for. These fucks at Churchill and Associates took my March Rent check and applied it as a Deposit because they still hadn't found it. Then they tried to say I was late on my March rent. I KNOW! You can't write this shit.... But here I am.... Needless to say, after I talked to the book keeper I told her straight up, "You just used and official document of intended use in an illegal manner." I pulled up a picture via the bank statement to verify I wrote March Rent on the check she used as a Deposit. Then I said to her, "You will apply this check as the Months Rent as it should have been used as." She agreed and then goes on record to tell me it's company policy to do this without the renters' knowledge. What the fuck kind of policy is this!? You have a policy to commit fraud? Thank you Churchill and Associates, not.
Months later they defaulted on properties they "managed" and sold our property off to Tara Management.
Then about a month into us being owned by Tara Management we got a phone call about them needing to visit our home to inspect the property and see what kind of Dog we have. Okay, fine! They show up, look around the house and then told us our Home Owners Association filed a complaint stating our dog was killing the grass. In fact, I'll share with you the actual letter. And I'll add commentary as I go along...
Dear Tenant,
The Krueger Commons HOA recently held our annual meeting. (A meeting we were not annually invited to attend. Gee, I wonder why?) During that meeting a number (not an exact number, but a number) of owners brought to our attention that you are not in compliance with the communities' CC&Rs concerning your pets on two issues. (CC&R is interesting because they hadn't explained what this means, so... Krueger Commons HOA, what is a CC&R?) Per the CC&Rs section 11.13 you are "fully responsible to clean up after your pet at all times. (I would also like to explain they said, "pets" and not pet.... We have ONE DOG. Not two, or three, or some demon child. And I'm not a Grammar Nazi but.... If you are going to quote from an instruction or some kind of guide line, please end said quote with " ". Personally I'd like to know who wrote this POS letter.)
First, it has been noticed that on multiple occasions you have failed to pick up after your pet (Now pets have moved to one pet, someone cannot keep a story straight to save their life.) either in part or in full (I'd like to know who in the world is a dog owner and only picks up half a dog shit.) and when you do that the bags of waste are often left on your front porch. (In a small trash can which is disposed of at a regular basis. Much like any other dog bag receptacle.) Also the repeated use of such a small area in front of your unit appears to have killed the grass in that area. (Wait, they're claiming the dead grass is caused by a dog and not a summer drought?) As a pet owner and tenant of the Commons you are responsible for any damage your pet may cause to the unit as well as the grounds. (Oh, please tell me what else is my responsibility?) We have contacted our landscaper and if reseeding is required the cost will be billed to you through your management company.
Secondly, leaving animal waste bagged on your porch presents a health hazard. We have children that live in the Commons and many that often visit as well as a number of other pets. (Children is an operative word, to the right of me is a teenager. And if she's stealing dog bags from the receptacle, than kids need to reevaluate how to get high.... Bulldog shit is not a clinical drug to get high off of. As for other pets.... Yes, other dogs go potty too. What, is my dog the ONLY dog you're having issues with?) On this issue, the BOD's have two options; (Who the fuck is the BOD??? Board of Director? Who is this? What does he do?) the first being to contact local health services and/or police and the second to require removal of your pet under section11.13 of the CC&Rs. (Big words for we'll report you and you can have a conversation with the police about some stupid shit. P.S. NO one has the right to take something that's yours. Pet, Chair, Television... etc. Sad to say a Pet is property. But in what legal standing does any entity have to take property from an owner if they are not abusive, mistreating and harming anyone or anything?)
We appreciate you compliance in these matters. (In other words FUCK YOU! and it's 'We appreciate your compliance in these matters.' You illiterate fuck. This is what happens when you leave an Officer to write an offical memo. Punctuation issues, and many others I can't even.... I.... +sigh+)
Sincerely,
Krueger Commons BOD
Also known as the douche nozzle Lieutenant Officer who has nothing better going on in life and is the "President" of the HOA.
So... Tara Property Management came over and they took a look at everything this letter was talking about. However, let me go on record to state we had no clue we moved into an HOA because it's not listed as an HOA, nor are any of these "rules and regulations" extra to the HOA added to our lease. Not a copy of this CC&Rs is given to us. And don't you think Mr. Lieutenant Officer, President of the HOA whom happens to live in the building to the left of me, you would have said, "Welcome to the Krueger Commons HOA, I'm your president and we have Annual Meetings on this date. I hope to see you soon?" No... Of course not.
So, we told the management people we want to find a new place. They didn't have anything available. Thus Lor began looking into new places to look at and we found a flat a little closer to my work. Which is nice. It's also a lot closer to our friends too. I'd also like to go on record our dog is an Emotional Support Dog and it's Emotionally non-Supporting of our HOA community to be picking on him. It's 2015 and we need a little more Emotional Support. Words hurt feelings, ya'know?
Well, there you go.... That happened in the past. Now for something a lot more different.
Lor and I went to our first Ren Fair in Washington. We spent a whole weekend on a designated farm aria. We got sun on our skin and had a blast! I'll have to say though my favorite part behind the whole experience is the fact Lor met two really sweet people, Zan and Logan. Zan is a writer and Logan is an Ethnomusicologist. Two people whom are right up my alley! What a blast the four of us had. Logan and I would aspire over music, theory, instruments and really nerd out on music. Zan and I would talk about her latest book she's writing and I would feel inspired by her pros and intentions. I'm not a writer. "Writer." I'm a blogger. I feel as though I'm inadequate to really add commentary because I'm not a professional. Okay, not a professional of my own work. But I digress.
Day one we set up camp. Walked around and had a lot of fun watching the shows. One thing which brought back good memories was the ferry's doing a May Pole dance. I feel the dance was too fast because the ribbons didn't exactly tie correctly. However, some parts of it was tied right. Another cool part was when there would be local artists playing music.
For a moment, within 48 hours of life communism kinda worked. Whatever drinks, food etc we had was shared with everyone at camp. Likewise, what was theirs was ours. Up till the point someone took my Muddy-Buddies. That's when I lost my cool. So, in hind-sight, communism didn't really work. But it was fun.
Leave it to Lor on night one to find a camp sight singing "Hotel California." We stopped by and added our voices and kept singing classic rock songs. "Landslide," and other tunes. Then all of a sudden I find out I'm talking to a Chief in the NAVY. Then come to find out they're all swingers! I KNOW! In my head, I'm like, 'Cool, you're a swinger married to her. And she's spending the night with him. Your'e spending the night with her and no one is pissed? huh... Whatever floats your boat.' I'll go on record to say, I've never met a swinger I couldn't get along with. They're lovely people, the swingers. Not my cup of coffee... I'm too monogynous in my up-bringing. But the idea other people have healthy relationships is neat to observe in life.
The Ren Fair was fun. Lor dressed up as a Warrior, and I was a Pirate by the name of Shmaa... Here's the small back story I have for my character.
Shmaa is the brother of the infamous Shmee. The shorter, fatter Boatswains mate to Capt. Hook. Shmaa is however, taller, skinny and an Yeoman for Capt. Peg-Leg.
Again, had a lot of fun over the past months. Stressed out as well as totally done with doing any "projects" for the rest of the year. Lor and I made a $50 dinner date bet I couldn't go the rest of the year without adding another project. So far, it's been a week and I haven't failed. I have till next year to start finding "projects." We'll see....
Last weekend I hosted my very own Out of the Darkness walk and raised $150 online and $98 at work. Which brings the grand total for $248! Which is by the way, above and beyond what I thought we could raise in the first place.
Saturday was a nasty day. Over cast was the name of the game. Lor looked at the forecast and told me it was supposed to let up before 11:00 and so in my head I said ONE thing to God... "God, you have a forecast schedule to stick too. Don't fuck me over." I'm sure that's not the best thing to say to God. But to be honest, it was like he had one day to NOT rain on my parade.
I showed up to the park and everyone I expected to be there was there. And I had a few surprises too which was nice. I had a photograph of my father for the walk and we all shared for a moment why we are all there. Everyone walked a 'nature walk' which had a beautiful scenery of the ocean and forest. Too soon 2 o'clock came and everyone went home before I could do my walk. However, a good friend walked with me and we talked about life. Then I went home.
This is an old story which I can't seem to get over. So, I'm going to go over it. I feel like this is something that could have been covered in a different post. However, this is a recap of 'Trials and Tribulations.' Nearly a month ago I got a phone call from our new property management.... Wait, let me go into this too....
So, when we moved into our beautiful condo in February it was nearly the worst situation to wind up in. Let's start with the fact the property management was a piece of shit. They knew two weeks in advance Lor and I were driving from Virginia to get into our condo. Then a week prior I called and said, 'We wont be able to make it on Friday. We'll see you on Monday." We spent the weekend in Woodburn and relaxed from traveling across America. We show up and the property management, "Churchill and Associates" was acting like they had no clue what we were talking about when we showed up. They gave us the garage to put our stuff into but kept the house keys till the utility guy 'fixed' whatever was wrong with the house. Fiar enough, but we had them pay for our hotel stay because Erica didn't put a sticky note on the property or even communicate with anyone we had intentions of moving in on Monday. What a hassle. Topping it all off I had mailed out a Safety Deposit two months prior and they had never "received" the check via mail. So they let us pay the rent and their job was to find the missing check. Two months later and I get a phone call on the 15th of March from them saying, "We haven't received your March Rent." Let's brake this down... On the MEMO section of the Check I've put what each check is supposed to be paying for. These fucks at Churchill and Associates took my March Rent check and applied it as a Deposit because they still hadn't found it. Then they tried to say I was late on my March rent. I KNOW! You can't write this shit.... But here I am.... Needless to say, after I talked to the book keeper I told her straight up, "You just used and official document of intended use in an illegal manner." I pulled up a picture via the bank statement to verify I wrote March Rent on the check she used as a Deposit. Then I said to her, "You will apply this check as the Months Rent as it should have been used as." She agreed and then goes on record to tell me it's company policy to do this without the renters' knowledge. What the fuck kind of policy is this!? You have a policy to commit fraud? Thank you Churchill and Associates, not.
Months later they defaulted on properties they "managed" and sold our property off to Tara Management.
Then about a month into us being owned by Tara Management we got a phone call about them needing to visit our home to inspect the property and see what kind of Dog we have. Okay, fine! They show up, look around the house and then told us our Home Owners Association filed a complaint stating our dog was killing the grass. In fact, I'll share with you the actual letter. And I'll add commentary as I go along...
Dear Tenant,
The Krueger Commons HOA recently held our annual meeting. (A meeting we were not annually invited to attend. Gee, I wonder why?) During that meeting a number (not an exact number, but a number) of owners brought to our attention that you are not in compliance with the communities' CC&Rs concerning your pets on two issues. (CC&R is interesting because they hadn't explained what this means, so... Krueger Commons HOA, what is a CC&R?) Per the CC&Rs section 11.13 you are "fully responsible to clean up after your pet at all times. (I would also like to explain they said, "pets" and not pet.... We have ONE DOG. Not two, or three, or some demon child. And I'm not a Grammar Nazi but.... If you are going to quote from an instruction or some kind of guide line, please end said quote with " ". Personally I'd like to know who wrote this POS letter.)
First, it has been noticed that on multiple occasions you have failed to pick up after your pet (Now pets have moved to one pet, someone cannot keep a story straight to save their life.) either in part or in full (I'd like to know who in the world is a dog owner and only picks up half a dog shit.) and when you do that the bags of waste are often left on your front porch. (In a small trash can which is disposed of at a regular basis. Much like any other dog bag receptacle.) Also the repeated use of such a small area in front of your unit appears to have killed the grass in that area. (Wait, they're claiming the dead grass is caused by a dog and not a summer drought?) As a pet owner and tenant of the Commons you are responsible for any damage your pet may cause to the unit as well as the grounds. (Oh, please tell me what else is my responsibility?) We have contacted our landscaper and if reseeding is required the cost will be billed to you through your management company.
Secondly, leaving animal waste bagged on your porch presents a health hazard. We have children that live in the Commons and many that often visit as well as a number of other pets. (Children is an operative word, to the right of me is a teenager. And if she's stealing dog bags from the receptacle, than kids need to reevaluate how to get high.... Bulldog shit is not a clinical drug to get high off of. As for other pets.... Yes, other dogs go potty too. What, is my dog the ONLY dog you're having issues with?) On this issue, the BOD's have two options; (Who the fuck is the BOD??? Board of Director? Who is this? What does he do?) the first being to contact local health services and/or police and the second to require removal of your pet under section11.13 of the CC&Rs. (Big words for we'll report you and you can have a conversation with the police about some stupid shit. P.S. NO one has the right to take something that's yours. Pet, Chair, Television... etc. Sad to say a Pet is property. But in what legal standing does any entity have to take property from an owner if they are not abusive, mistreating and harming anyone or anything?)
We appreciate you compliance in these matters. (In other words FUCK YOU! and it's 'We appreciate your compliance in these matters.' You illiterate fuck. This is what happens when you leave an Officer to write an offical memo. Punctuation issues, and many others I can't even.... I.... +sigh+)
Sincerely,
Krueger Commons BOD
Also known as the douche nozzle Lieutenant Officer who has nothing better going on in life and is the "President" of the HOA.
So... Tara Property Management came over and they took a look at everything this letter was talking about. However, let me go on record to state we had no clue we moved into an HOA because it's not listed as an HOA, nor are any of these "rules and regulations" extra to the HOA added to our lease. Not a copy of this CC&Rs is given to us. And don't you think Mr. Lieutenant Officer, President of the HOA whom happens to live in the building to the left of me, you would have said, "Welcome to the Krueger Commons HOA, I'm your president and we have Annual Meetings on this date. I hope to see you soon?" No... Of course not.
So, we told the management people we want to find a new place. They didn't have anything available. Thus Lor began looking into new places to look at and we found a flat a little closer to my work. Which is nice. It's also a lot closer to our friends too. I'd also like to go on record our dog is an Emotional Support Dog and it's Emotionally non-Supporting of our HOA community to be picking on him. It's 2015 and we need a little more Emotional Support. Words hurt feelings, ya'know?
Well, there you go.... That happened in the past. Now for something a lot more different.
Lor and I went to our first Ren Fair in Washington. We spent a whole weekend on a designated farm aria. We got sun on our skin and had a blast! I'll have to say though my favorite part behind the whole experience is the fact Lor met two really sweet people, Zan and Logan. Zan is a writer and Logan is an Ethnomusicologist. Two people whom are right up my alley! What a blast the four of us had. Logan and I would aspire over music, theory, instruments and really nerd out on music. Zan and I would talk about her latest book she's writing and I would feel inspired by her pros and intentions. I'm not a writer. "Writer." I'm a blogger. I feel as though I'm inadequate to really add commentary because I'm not a professional. Okay, not a professional of my own work. But I digress.
Day one we set up camp. Walked around and had a lot of fun watching the shows. One thing which brought back good memories was the ferry's doing a May Pole dance. I feel the dance was too fast because the ribbons didn't exactly tie correctly. However, some parts of it was tied right. Another cool part was when there would be local artists playing music.
For a moment, within 48 hours of life communism kinda worked. Whatever drinks, food etc we had was shared with everyone at camp. Likewise, what was theirs was ours. Up till the point someone took my Muddy-Buddies. That's when I lost my cool. So, in hind-sight, communism didn't really work. But it was fun.
Leave it to Lor on night one to find a camp sight singing "Hotel California." We stopped by and added our voices and kept singing classic rock songs. "Landslide," and other tunes. Then all of a sudden I find out I'm talking to a Chief in the NAVY. Then come to find out they're all swingers! I KNOW! In my head, I'm like, 'Cool, you're a swinger married to her. And she's spending the night with him. Your'e spending the night with her and no one is pissed? huh... Whatever floats your boat.' I'll go on record to say, I've never met a swinger I couldn't get along with. They're lovely people, the swingers. Not my cup of coffee... I'm too monogynous in my up-bringing. But the idea other people have healthy relationships is neat to observe in life.
The Ren Fair was fun. Lor dressed up as a Warrior, and I was a Pirate by the name of Shmaa... Here's the small back story I have for my character.
Shmaa is the brother of the infamous Shmee. The shorter, fatter Boatswains mate to Capt. Hook. Shmaa is however, taller, skinny and an Yeoman for Capt. Peg-Leg.
Again, had a lot of fun over the past months. Stressed out as well as totally done with doing any "projects" for the rest of the year. Lor and I made a $50 dinner date bet I couldn't go the rest of the year without adding another project. So far, it's been a week and I haven't failed. I have till next year to start finding "projects." We'll see....
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